Embracing Joy on the Dance Floor: Overcoming the Fear of Looking Stupid

Finding Freedom in Dance

In a recent lesson with a couple, I started the way I always do: "What would you like to get out of this lesson?"

Their answer was painfully familiar: "We want to have fun on the dance floor… but we don’t want to look stupid."

That statement, this fear of “looking silly,” always makes me both mad and sad. Mad, because somewhere along the way, we’ve been taught to shrink our joy to fit someone else’s opinion. Sad, because I see couples come to me full of love for each other, for music, and for dancing… yet worried that their personal expression of that passion might be “wrong,” “unacceptable,” or “unimpressive.”

Dip however you wanna dip.

Who Are You Trying to Impress?

I have to ask, who are you trying to impress? Whose opinion is so important that you’d withhold your joy for it?

Yes, every dance has formal steps. Yes, I can coach you on movement that not only looks better but feels better. But if your top priority is to avoid looking “stupid,” I can’t help you; because “stupid” exists only in your mind.

The moment you try to impress someone, you open the door to insecurity: Do they like it? Did I do it the way they want? Does it match the video I saw online?

The Importance of Connection

Now imagine this: You have one dance, one single moment with the most important person in your life. Your son. Your daughter. Your partner. Your father or mother. Would you let the fear of looking goofy steal that moment from you? That one chance to connect, laugh, and love… traded for worrying about a stranger’s opinion?

Sounds ridiculous when you put it like that, doesn’t it?

A coach is helpful

Shift Your Focus to Feelings

So, here’s a thought: What if, before worrying about how you look, you focus on how you feel? Step onto the floor and ask yourself, Why am I here?

• To play?

• To laugh?

• To fall in love?

• To find joy?

• Or… to impress a judge? (Which is a whole other topic.)

  
  

Once you know your intention, you can dance from that place. A dance rooted in laughter will look different than a dance rooted in romance, but both will be beautiful because they’re genuine.

The Role of Instructors

Of course, your favorite Western Roots instructors are here to teach you the steps and coach your movement. But the feeling of “looking stupid”? My friend, that’s on you. As Forrest Gump so wisely said, “Stupid is as stupid does.” If you decide your joy looks foolish, you’re the one robbing yourself of it.

Reflecting on Joyful Moments

When I think back to the most fun dances in my life, there’s a beautiful irony: they often came hand-in-hand with me looking less than professional. But you know what? I wouldn’t erase a single one.

Dance as a Form of Expression

Dancing is not just about the steps; it’s about expressing who you are. Each movement tells a story. When you dance, you share a piece of yourself with the world. This connection is what makes dance so powerful.

Letting Go of Judgment

To truly enjoy dancing, you must let go of judgment. This includes your judgment of yourself and the judgment of others. Remember, everyone is there to enjoy the moment, just like you.

The Joy of Learning Together

Learning to dance can be a journey filled with laughter and joy. Embrace the process. Celebrate your progress, no matter how small. Each step you take brings you closer to your goal.

Conclusion: Dance with Abandon

In conclusion, dance with abandon. Let go of the fear of looking stupid. Focus on the joy of the moment. Dance is a celebration of life, love, and connection. So, step onto that floor and let your spirit shine.

Remember, the only opinion that matters is your own. Dance for yourself, and the joy will follow.